Loneliness

Loneliness, where are you coming from?
You seem like the only companion
Who is around me right now
To listen
To watch
To respond
And share
Never too busy for me, are you?
You follow me like a shadow
Ready to show up
The moment the rest have deserted
How long have I known you?
Do I even remember life without you?

Yes, there have been moments
When I've met myself
And you were nowhere to be seen
I wonder where that girl is now
I'd like her to meet you
Maybe she doesn't know you yet
Maybe she'll say hello the next time
Or maybe she doesn't need to
She seems to have friends already
Or friendship

I've the latter
But often not the former
They are all too busy, most times,
To respond, to listen, to converse
To sit back and share life as it happens
Sometimes I reach out, and that works
But most times I'm disappointed
Waiting
Tired
Dejected
Then I slowly walk back to you

For you see, loneliness, you're the only friend
That I can truly claim to have.

This day

Why should I look a certain way?
Not wear what I goddamn please?
It's a good day to remind myself
I wasn't born to appease

Not born to fit roles
Pre-defined for me
Nor be this 'good girl'
For the world to see

I'll be uncouth and rough
In the company of raucous friends
Stretch your lines
To see where it ends

Yet I walk cautious
In a public place
Elbows jutting out
Define my space

But now I choose to expand
And claim what was mine
Be it space, voice, or consent
I won't burn to shine

Don't try to contain or define
Who I am or could be
Water, fire, earth or sky
The choice is upto me

On Women's Day (may we never need one)
08 March, 2017

Write

'Write something', she says,
That insistent voice inside me,
Holds me to ransom for days,
Doesn't let me be.

'Write something, anything,
So long as it's something true.
Please ignore that WhatsApp ping,
Where you seek something new.'

'Write of the sun and moonshine,
Of days dark and ablaze,
Of feeling blue or fine,
Sudden clarity and stubborn haze.'

'Write to share, to vent, to whine,
About matters big and small.
Write to spread some sunshine,
Caught by few, though meant for all'

'Write', she says, 'for heaven's sake'
'Do you want me to just give up on you?
My niggling finger if you do not take,
I'll vanish without a clue.'

So here I am, dear friends,
Putting pen to paper,
Lest my restlessness ends,
And that voice turns to vapour.

Desire

Desire, thy tentacles are vicious
Slowly crawling up to my heart
A red-hot bullet piercing my chest
Staying buried there
As regret
With the passage of time.